Again I would like to mention that never a pregnant teen nor have I ever been pregnant. I just thought this topic worked with where I wanted to take this story. All info about her pregnancy came from pregmed.org so I apologize if any of it is incorrect.
Week 8: February 12 – February 25
I have been spending a lot of time playing with my niece Lynn. She is a wonderful baby and I see her as good practice.
I give her baths.
Change her diapers. I am not so good with the baby powder. Thankfully, I have some time yet to practice.
I put her down for her naps.
This week Dr. Colvin wanted me to come in for a check up. Kim came with me again for moral support. Dr. Colvin wanted to know how things were going and if I was experiencing any symptoms. I mentioned that I had been having some issues with morning sickness that seemed to be triggered by certain smells, particularly food smells.
She explained that was normal and gave me some recommendations to help with the nausea.
After that she had me get up on the exam table for an exam.
“And there is your baby,” she said pointing to the screen. She told me the baby was about the size of a medium raspberry. She said she could see the tip of the baby’s nose, eyelids and ears but I couldn’t make them out.
I decided that I wanted to keep a journal detailing everything I was experiencing during this time. I still want to be a doctor so learning about all the medical aspects and the changes the body goes through during pregnancy was fascinating to me. I just wished that I was studying a simulation or reading a case study and not actually living this.
I have accepted that I am going to be a mother at 16 and have grown to love my baby. Am I thrilled about being a teen mother? No I am not. I wished I had waited until later in life to be a mother.
In addition to reading up on pregnancy I am also studying the statistics on being a teen parent.
Did you know that 3 out of 10 girls will get pregnant before age 20 and that less than 50% will graduate high school. And that only two percent will earn a college degree before they are 30. I want to go college and become a doctor and being pregnant at 15 doesn’t change that. If anything it makes me want it more. I would someday like to be like Dr. Colvin and help others the way she has helped me. I decided, I was going to be in that two percent and I would finish college before I was 30.
I have started to experience more of the symptoms that Dr. Colvin told me were possible. For starters I have to pee all the time. I mean one minute I am fine and the next I have to go so bad I feel like I could burst.
I also seem to burst into tears at the drop of a hat. Yesterday I started crying in the library because a book I was looking for was checked out already and I had wanted it for a paper for school.
And of course the morning sickness. Or should I say morning, noon, and night sickness.
Week 9: February 19-February 25
I am now in my 9th week of pregnancy and my baby is the size of a green olive. He or she is currently developing the brain, nerves and spinal cord.
In terms of how it is all effecting me, I have noticed a slight weight gain and the nausea also seems to be getting worse. It is no longer triggered by only food smells. It feels like I am always nauseous.
The other night I woke up in the middle of the night and just knew I was going to throw up the nausea was so bad. I bolted from bed.
And my stomach rolled.
I couldn’t even make it to the bathroom. I threw up all over my bedroom floor.
Kevin heard me get sick and assumed I had the flu. He called me out sick from school and spent the day with me. We played chess.
Until I had to run and get sick again.
He made me soup which I managed to keep down. I spent almost the entire week home from school I was so sick. I hate missing school.
Week 10: February 26-March 4
I can tell Kevin is getting really worried about me so I decided I couldn’t keep it from him anymore.
“Kevin, can I talk to you for a second?” I asked
“Sure,” he said.
“Remember over New Years when you and Stephen went to Hidden Springs?”
“Well, while you were gone I had a party.”
“Stephan and I were kind of hoping you would.”
“You were? Why?”
“Because you had been so down. We thought maybe if Sarah could convince you to have a party you would have fun for once. We hated seeing how sad you were all the time. Was that want you wanted to tell me?”
“Part of it, but there is more. Gwen’s boyfriend is older and he brought a keg. I know I should have made him take it away but I was so tired of feeling sad. I thought maybe drinking would take the pain away. I know it was stupid. Anyway I had too much to drink and did something even more stupid.”
“You didn’t go drink and then drive did you?”
“No, I made sure before I started drinking to take everyone’s keys. At least I made one smart choice that night. Anyway there was this boy there. He wasn’t from my school but he was cute and he seemed to like me. We danced and made out. I could blame it on the alcohol or on just wanting to feel something other than sadness but I ended up woohooing with him. I only ever got his first name and he left the next morning. I haven’t heard from him since.”
“Did he force himself on you or hurt you in anyway?”
“No, we were both equally responsible and willing at the time. Um, I don’t know how to say this other then to just come out with it but I am pregnant. 10 weeks.”
Kevin was of course shocked.
“Please don’t be mad and throw me out,” I cried.
“Oh honey, I would never throw you out. We are family and support each other no matter what.”
After I finished crying Kevin asked how I was feeling. I told him the morning sickness had been awful and he insisted that we get it checked out by my doctor.
“I see you have someone new with you today,” she said when she walked into the room.
“Yes this is my brother Kevin.”
“Hello, Kevin. I am Dr. Colvin. I am happy to see that Kaitlyn has a good support system. She will need it. So what brings you in today?” she asked.
“I have been having terrible morning sickness. It is to the point that I am hardly eating or sleeping. I just missed a week of school. I can’t get so far behind.”
“Ok I will get some anti-nausea meds that are safe for baby and that should help. Since you are here do you want to see the baby?”
“Well there is baby,” Dr. Colvin said pointing to the screen.
I was amazed. For the first time I could actually make out the baby as opposed to a big blob on the screen. I could see that the head had started to form. I asked Dr. Colvin to print me out a picture to take home as I wanted to make sure to show Kim.
Week 11: March 5 – March 11
This week the baby is about the size of a lime and should be starting to form nail beds.
While I am not yet showing I have noticed I am gaining some weight around my middle forcing me to go up a size in clothes. So far I do not think anyone has noticed or they have been to polite to say anything.
Thanks to the anti-nausea medication that Dr. Colvin gave me I have had no more morning sicknesses which has been great. Since I am no longer feeling sick I am now able to concentrate on school work and am working hard to get caught up after missing a week of school.
Now that I am no longer nauseous I have also started to get food cravings. For some reason, all I have been able to think about lately is Philly Cheesesteak sandwiches. I was so happy to see they were serving them in the cafeteria at school one day that I cried. Stupid hormones.
I also seem to be less tired and can mange to stay up long enough after school to do all of my homework.
Week 12: March 12-18
I felt bad that all of my siblings knew about the baby except Kaden (well not counting my sister Kristen as she is out of the country on tour with her band).
For some reason telling Kaden scared me the most. We were the closest in age and of all my siblings he was the one I had spent the most time with growing up.
As soon as I saw him I burst into tears and threw myself into his arms.
Alarmed he asked, “Are you ok?”
I nodded against his shoulder but still held on.
Eventually Jamiee came over to see what the matter was. With them both there I told them, “I’m 12 weeks pregnant.” And then went on to explain how that came to be.
They were both very supportive. Jamiee asked me how I was feeling. I told her the morning sickness had finally started to subside but that it had been bad for awhile. Kaden asked if I told the others yet and I informed him that I had with the exception of Kristen. He offered to go with me to my next appointment. I told him it was scheduled for later that week. He promised to be there.
I then spent some time playing with my nephew Leo. He is a pretty cute baby.
Before I left Kaden gave me a big hug and told me that he was there for me no mater what.
Later that night I got a call from Kyle. He had heard that the rest of the family finally knew. He said that he would like to come with Kaden to the appointment.
All of their love and support was just too much and I started sobbing again.
Dr. Colvin was happy to see two more of my brothers showing their support. She showed us all the baby who at 12 weeks is now as big as a plum. We were also able to hear the baby’s heart beat for the first time on a Doppler device.
Of course Kyle being Kyle he had to flirt with Nurse Kelsey. His favorite line is “I’m a Firefighter.” Apparently the women can’t resist him when he says things like that. I hope Nurse Kelsey gives him a run for his money.
Week 13: March 19-25
This morning when I looked in the mirror I noticed a small baby bump. I don’t think it will be visible to anyone else.
It does seem a little more pronounced when I sit but that could just be my imagination.
According to the books I have been reading the baby is the size of a peach. I also read that this week he/she is developing fingerprints and is starting to move it’s tiny arms and legs.
I am experiencing more and more cravings. One morning this week I woke up at 4 am desperately needing waffles. I followed a recipe.
But I some how managed to burn them. In that moment nothing seemed worse then those burnt waffles and I started sobbing uncontrollably.
I didn’t have time to make more waffles so I settled with pouring maple syrup over oatmeal. It was ok but NOT the waffles I wanted.
At school one day I was in the bathroom when I heard Ruby and Trudy Hooper whispering.
“Who does Kaitlyn think she is kidding. I mean it is SO obvious,” Trudy said.
I froze in shock, did they know I was pregnant? I didn’t think I showed that much. In fact underneath my sweater I didn’t think you could tell at all.
“I know, right.” Ruby said. “It is so obvious she has started padding her bra.”
“Oh I don’t think she is padding it. Remember when she was out for that whole week? I think she got her boobs done. They look too natural for her to be stuffing tissues in her bra.”
“Wow, she will try anything to get a guy to notice her.”
They both started laughing as they left the bathroom.
The worst part is I think Trudy knew I was in the bathroom the whole time.
Of course when I got out of the stall I was in tears. But I told myself I needed to get a thicker skin. If minor gossip like this bothers me what is going to happen in a few more weeks when I start showing more than just my tiny baby bump and slightly bigger chest.
Later that night Gwen and Sarah came over to study and then have sleep over.
“I have something I need to tell you both,” I said. “Do you remember Jonathan?”
“The boy with the dreamy blue eyes,” Gwen said. “Did you finally track him down?”
“No,” I said. “As you recall we all drank a lot that night. You also may remember that Jonathan and I made out for awhile. Well what you probably didn’t know is after the guests all past out or fell asleep downstairs Jonathan and I snuck upstairs and made out some more in private. One thing led to an other and I slept with him.”
“WHAT!” they both cried.
“That’s not all,” I said. “I’m pregnant. Currently 13 weeks.”
After my announcement both girls started talking at once asking me questions.
Both girls were very supportive. Sarah is such a goofball and she started talking to the baby calling herself auntie Sarah.
Later after the Sarah had gone to sleep Gwen came up to me and gave me a huge hug. She then told me that her older sister had gotten pregnant at 16. Her mom and step-dad had her kicked her out and the boyfriend, whom supposedly loved her, wanted nothing to do with her or the baby. Gwen tried to keep in touch but her mom found out and started screening her e-mail. She told me I was brave and that if anyone could beat the odds it was me.
Of course that made me cry.
The next morning I went downstairs and gave Kevin a big hug.
“What was that for?” he asked.
“I just wanted to thank you for being so supportive. Not everyone would be.”
“Hey you are my kid sister and yes you made a mistake and are going through a rough time but I would never turn my back on you. You kid are stuck with me.”
Of course that set off the waterworks again.
Then he surprised me with a plate of waffles. He gets the award for BEST BIG BROTHER EVER!
Week 14: March 26-April 1
I am now in my second trimester. My baby bump is slightly bigger but I still don’t think it is big enough for anyone to notice. I don’t think I am ready for that yet.
According to my pregnancy book the baby should be almost as big as a lemon.
On a positive note I have loads of energy all of a sudden. I started going back to debate club after school. I was in a mock debate with Lawrence Lum and I beat down everyone of his arguments. I was in top form.
The look on his face was priceless.
My clothes are also starting to get a little uncomfortable. They are still ok but I know it will only be a matter of time before I need maternity clothes. So after school one day I asked Sarah and Gwen to go shopping with me.
I got some pants and tops that will expand with me as I grow.
We found some cute dresses for all seasons.
Including one for the end of year formal. I will be 22 weeks by then. I am not sure if I will even want to go to the dance but the girls insisted I buy a dress.
I also got a couple of bathing suit for summer.
After we went to the coffee shop and had a snack. Baby was craving something chocolate so I had a chocolate muffin.
Then we sat around and worked on homework. It was nice to get out of the house.
Week 15: April 2 – April 8
The first week in April we had a week off from school so I asked Gwen and Sarah to come with to my check-up. Gwen couldn’t go as she was going out of town for the break but Sarah was excited to come with me.
“There is your baby,” Dr. Colvin said as she pointed at the screen.
I hadn’t seen the baby for a couple of weeks and I couldn’t believe how much he/she had changed. It was so adorable as the baby was sucking his/her thumb.
“At this point in your pregnancy the baby is about the size of an apple or navel orange,” Dr. Colvin said.
After the appointment we decided to stop by the spring festival. I was thrilled to see Kim there as I couldn’t wait to show her the picture.
She gave me a big hug and said she was glad I was feeling better and that things were going ok.
It was a nice day and Sarah and I went fishing.
Until the baby decided he/she wanted ice cream.
My back has also really started to bother me lately.
Dr. Colvin said that I needed to start working on relaxation and breathing techniques. She recommended taking a yoga class. So when Gwen got home the three of us took a yoga class at the gym.
Week 16: April 9-15
The following Monday when I was getting ready for school I noticed that my shirt no longer came down over my baby bump. Good thing I bought some new clothes.
As I changed into my maternity clothes I actually felt pregnant for the first time.
I decided it was probably time to let the school know. I went to see Mr. Jamison the principal and also the science teacher.
“Miss Equidae what can I do for you this morning?” he asked.
“I need to tell you something. As you may remember my parents were killed back in late November and after that I sort of fell apart.”
“Yes I remember your grades fell considerably during that time. I was worried about you. But then as I recall shortly after the new year you pulled yourself together and have been doing well ever since.”
“Yes, you see, I made some really bad decisions during my period of grief. This is embarrassing for me to say and I know you will be highly disappointed but on New Years Eve I had a party and yes there was alcohol there. I drank to much and ended up woohooing with a boy at the party. A boy not from around here. He didn’t take advantage or do anything wrong other then disappear the next morning. I am currently 16 weeks pregnant.”
Mr. Jamison was the first person to actually yell at me after hearing the news. I actually kind of imagine he reacted the way my father would have if he would still have been alive.
“KAITLYN, HOW COULD YOU DO SOMETHING SO STUPID. YOU HAD SUCH AMAZING POTENTIAL. WHAT ABOUT YOUR DREAM TO BECOME A DOCTOR?”
“That is still my dream,” I said. “I still plan to graduate with the rest of my class and I still want to go to college and study medicine. It just may not happen when I planned.”
“Now that I know we are going to have to make some changes to your curriculum starting immediately.”
“What do you mean?”
“I can’t have you in chemistry class anymore. We are going to be working with some dangerous chemicals that could be hazardous to the baby.”
“But I need chemistry to graduate. There is only a few months left of the school year. Surely I won’t have to retake an entire class that I currently have an A?” I asked starting to feel very panicked.
“No we will make other arrangements for you to get the credit for the course.”
The other arrangements turned out to be me sitting in the library studying chemistry textbooks.
And doing simulations online. Which were NO where near as fun as actual chemistry class.
I still have cravings and I was thrilled when I saw we were having spaghetti for lunch one day. So thrilled I took a larger portion then I normally would have. At least I was thrilled until I heard whispering behind me.
“Did you see how much food Kaitlyn took today? It is now wonder she put on so much weight over break,” I heard Trudy whisper to her sister.
Then they both started to laugh.
There is so much change going on to not only my body but also at school with my classes. Added to that all of the gossip and whispering about me. It all seemed to be just too much this week.
Week 17: April 16-22
Last week was so stressful with all of the changes at school I started doing yoga at home as a way to relax.
I have also been doing ballet as a way to stretch and work on my balance. I am by nature clumsy and Dr. Colvin said I will only become more so as my center of gravity shifts.
I have also started meditating again. When I meditate I picture myself back in that beautiful garden in China.
I am working my way through my baby books. According to the books the baby is now almost as big as an onion.
I have also started to feel little fluttering movements. The books call this quickening and I guess I am feeling the baby move around – kicking his/her arms and legs.
Weeks 18: April 23-29
The weather at the end of April was wonderful. One day during my 18th week I was sitting outside of the school during a break between classes reading. According to my book the baby is the size of a sweet potato right now.
I looked up from the book and saw Sarah running towards me out of breath.
She pulled me in for a big hug.
I asked her what was wrong and she said, “Gwen and I have been looking all over school for you!”
“Why?” I asked.
“Because your news is all over the school.”
“News? Oh! So the other students have figured out I am pregnant?”
“Well Trudy and Ruby have and you know if they figured it out they will inform the whole school. I guess Gwen was in the bathroom and overheard them gossiping about how you were knocked up. They were . . .”
“They were what?” I asked.
“Oh never mind, it isn’t important.”
“Just tell me.”
“Fine, they were laughing about how ironic it was that the quote-unquote school genius is the one stupid enough to get knocked up at 15.”
“Ok, well that was a little more painful then I thought it would be. They aren’t holding anything back.”
“Are you ok? Do you need me to get a teacher or anything? Or I can call your brother or Kim.”
“No actually I am fine. Relieved actually. I had been dreading everyone finding out but now it is over and I can move forward. They had to find out eventually.”
I did sit on the floor when I got home and have a good cry.
Week 19: April 30-May 6
On May 1st we celebrated Lynn’s birthday.
She is an adorable toddler.
My favorite part of the party was the giant piece of birthday cake I got to eat.
Her favorite game is tickle monster. She just giggles and giggles.
I tried helping teach her how to walk.
But all the bending was hurting my back. I will have to leave that to her dads.
Instead we have fun reading stories and playing with her toys.
School has been really hard lately. Each day that goes by my pregnancy becomes more and more visible. The Hooper twins are relentless with their gossip. Wherever I go at schools it seemed they are there whispering about me.
Week 20: May 7-May 13
I am in my 20th week of pregnancy now – four and half months along with another four and half to go. I can’t believe I am half way there. According to the books he/she is about the size of a banana. I have started to feel the baby kick on the outside now too as well as on the inside.
The first time I felt it I called for Kevin and told him to put his hand on my stomach. He thought it was pretty cool too.
I also went in for my mid-pregnancy ultrasound so that Dr. Colvin could check for any anomalies.
I admit I was pretty nervous. I was worried something could be wrong with the baby and because it was the first appointment I went to by myself.
“No one came with you today?” she asked surprised as I seemed to always have someone new with me.
“No I wanted to come alone this time. I am hoping you can tell me the baby’s gender. I want to do up something special to announce the gender and surprise everyone.”
“Ok, well let’s take a look then shall we. As you can see,” she said, “the baby is in the perfect position for us to see the gender. And it looks like everything is looking good. All of the baby’s limbs look fine, I can see ten fingers and ten toes, and it looks like the baby is good size wise. I would say you are on target to deliver around September 24 like I originally said.”
I couldn’t even say much more than to thank her for every thing. I was so relieved that the baby was healthy and also excited for my reveal.
As I was leaving Nurse Kelsey came up to me. “Kaitlyn, can I talk to you for a second?”
“Sure,” I said. “Everything ok?”
“Great actually. I have been seeing your brother Kyle and he has asked me to marry him.”
“That’s wonderful,” I said. “So the ‘I’m a Firefighter’ worked on you after all,” I teased.
I gave her a big hug. I am looking forward to her becoming my sister.
“The wedding is set for August 20 and I would love for you to be my maid of honor.”
Stupid hormones! I felt myself start to get teary eyed. I happily accepted. I will be 35 weeks on their wedding day.
Of course I had to call my brother and congratulate him.
Week 21: May 14-May 20
The following week I made arrangements for a photographer to come to the house and take my picture. I dressed in a pink shirt and surrounded myself with pink flowers. I made a heart with my hands in front of my bump. I think it turned out great. I sent it to my family and friends. They are all thrilled that I am having a baby girl. Though I think they would be equally thrilled if I were having a boy.
Now that I know I am having a girl I have decided on a name. I am going to name her Liliann Spring Equidae but plan to call her Lily for short. I miss my mother terribly and want to do something special to honor her by so went with Spring as the middle name. Rather than just name her Lily I choose Liliann as I wanted to pay a tribute to our family founder Anna Equidae.
This week I am craving mac & cheese.
Fortunately, I was able to make it without burning it.
Then one night I woke up at like three am.
Desperate for chocolate ice cream.
Kim and Jamiee also surprised me this week by taking me out for a nice dinner to celebrate Mother’s Day. It was in that moment that it really hit home that I am going to be a mother.
Kelsey also joined us and we discussed her and Kyle’s wedding.
Of course we also discussed babies and Kelsey surprised us all with news that she was 6 weeks pregnant. She said she still plans to get married on August 20. She will be at 20 weeks by then.
Week 22: May 21-May 27
It is the second to last week of school and let me tell you it cannot come fast enough. Today I was walking to class when I heard the sound of laughter. I turned to see what was so funny and turns out they were all laughing at me. I overheard Trudy say that I waddle like a duck when I walk.
I was so embarrassed I stopped walking and put my head down.
But the laughter continued and I of course burst into tears which only made some of them laugh harder.
Sarah came out, slapped Trudy and told her to stop being such a bully.
Then she turned her attention on everyone else and let them have it for just standing there and /or taking part by laughing and pointing.
While Sarah was yelling at everyone Gwen was doing her best to comfort me. I have such great friends.
At the end of the week we had the end of spring dance. I am not sure how I let Gwen and Sarah convince me to come to this thing. Kevin ordered us a limo.
The gym was beautifully decorated and the DJ they hired was awesome. I danced for a couple songs.
But my back hurt so bad I couldn’t stand it.
I found a place I could sit where I could just watch everyone else dance.
When a slow dance came on I was surprised when Bobbie Hooper asked me to dance. He had been right there with this sisters earlier in the week pointing and laughing at me. He apologized and I agreed to dance.
We danced slowly to the music and things were great.
Until I stepped on his foot. He said he was ok but I figured that was enough dancing for me for awhile. I left the gym and went to use the ladies room.
When I came out of the bathroom Trudy and Ruby were waiting for me. Trudy got right up in my face shouted, “YOU LEAVE MY BROTHER ALONE.”
Hearing the commotion Sarah came running.
Next thing I knew Sarah and Trudy were on the floor fighting.
After the fight I just sank to the floor by my locker. What am I doing here? Maybe I won’t be able to do this – finish school.
Trudy and Sarah both got in trouble for fighting and asked to leave the dance.
While Sarah was being yelled at, Gwen was comforting me.
She gave me a big hug and said, “come on lets get you home.”
When we got home I was emotionally drained. I feel asleep on top of my bed still wearing my dress. I slept with my hand over Lily, protecting her from all of Trudy’s of the world. Sarah and Gwen spent the night to make sure I was ok.
That night I had a strange dream. In the dream my mother’s ghost came to see me. I was worried she was angry with me but she was there to give me advice.
And to let me cry in her arms.
She told me that everything was going to be ok.
And that I needed to go back to school.
She placed her hand on my belly and wished me well. Then I woke up.
Week 23: May 28-June 3
The following Monday I got on that bus for the last week of my Sophomore year.
And when the bus got to the school I walked in with my head held high.